SPEED Madam Silvia! Madam Silvia!

VALENTINE   How now, sirrah?

SPEED She is not within hearing, sir.

VALENTINE Why, sir, who bade you call her?

SPEED Your worship, sir, or else I mistook.

VALENTINE Well, you’ll still be too forward.

SPEED And yet I was last chidden for being too slow.

VALENTINE Go to, sir. Tell me, do you know Madam Silvia?

SPEED She that your worship loves?

VALENTINE Why, how know you that I am in love?          (2.1.7-16)

Speed is, of course, being wilfully obtuse, pretending that Valentine’s ecstatic sighing of Silvia’s name is his calling her name to summon her to him—hence his repetition, perhaps at high volume, hollering, his hand cupped to his mouth: Madam Silvia! Madam Silvia! Oi! Um, what are you DOING, asks Valentine; how now, sirrah? Speed continues the joke: well, I was copying you and calling her, but, well, she is not within hearing, sir. Valentine is slow on the uptake (and will continue to be so; also, he’s entirely preoccupied with Silvia’s glove): why, sir, who bade you call her? why would you? who asked you to? Your worship, sir, or else I mistook. You were calling her yourself, and so I copied you—oh, did I get that wrong? Oooops. (Funnier if there are other people on stage, if it’s a street scene, for instance.) Well, you’ll still be too forward, is the best Valentine can manage; stop being so pert, you’re getting ideas above your station, getting ahead of yourself. And yet I was last chidden for being too slow, retorts Speed: that was the last thing you told me off for. (It’s partly a joke on Speed’s name, although he hasn’t yet been named in the dialogue; perhaps Shakespeare’s forgotten this?) Oh, go to, sir, that’s enough, stop messing around; I have a more important question for you, this is serious. Tell me, do you know Madam Silvia? Do you know HER? (Valentine thought it was secret, that no one else—let alone his servant and closest companion—would have noticed! Or else, Valentine hasn’t considered that Speed might be useful in this situation, that he might have information, for instance.) Do I know Madam Silvia? She that your worship loves? I should say I do; I’ve been watching you and you’re not exactly subtle. Valentine can’t believe it! He has been so discreet, so cool: why, how know you that I am in love? How can you possibly have worked that out? And so he sets up Speed’s first set piece in the scene.