VALENTINE    But tell me, dost thou know my lady Silvia?

SPEED            She that you gaze on so as she sits at supper?

VALENTINE Hast thou observed that? Even she I mean.

SPEED Why sir, I know her not.

VALENTINE Dost thou know her by my gazing on her, and yet know’st her not?

SPEED Is she not hard-favoured, sir?

VALENTINE Not so fair, boy, as well-favoured.

SPEED Sir, I know that well enough.

VALENTINE What dost thou know?

SPEED That she is not so fair as, of you, well-favoured.   (2.1.35-45)

Valentine’s had enough of being mocked; he wants intel, having not hitherto imagined that Speed might be able to provide some. (And he also, perhaps, wants the pleasure of hearing his beloved spoken of—and at the same time, he’s demonstrating that he is potentially jealous and possessive.) But tell me, dost thou know my lady Silvia? Really? You know who I mean? She that you gaze on so as she sits at supper? If that’s the one, that you’re mooning after, missing your mouth with the fork, staring at in a frankly stalker-ish and weird way—yes. Hast thou observed that? Oh. I thought I was being subtle. Yes. Her. Even she I mean; that’s The ONE. Why sir, I know her not. Speed’s quibbling again: of course I don’t know her in the biblical sense, wink. No actual carnal knowledge here. As far as Valentine’s concerned—whooosh—straight over the head, as he tries to puzzle that out. Dost thou know her by my gazing on her, and yet thou know’st her not? That really doesn’t make sense, knowing and not knowing…

Speed tries another wind-up tactic. Is she not hard-favoured, sir? Bit of a plain Jane? (He really means, though, she’s holding out on you, isn’t she? playing hard to get?) Not so fair, boy, as well-favoured. She’s not just beautiful, she’s really—fabulous, attractive, amazing in every possible way. Sir, I know that well enough; that’s obvious (there might be a gesture of particular approbation from Speed at Silvia’s evident sex appeal). Suspicion: does Speed know something about Silvia that Valentine doesn’t? What dost thou know? That she is not so fair as, of you, well-favoured.Laboured. Yes, she’s beautiful, but the degree to which you’re obsessed with her exceeds even her beauty…