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Slow Shakespeare

Author: Hester Lees-Jeffries

Julia: I’m as pretty as Silvia! I’m her equal! WHY doesn’t Proteus love me anymore, then? (4.4.170-182) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

JULIA  Here is her picture. Let me see, I think If I had such a tire, this face of mine Were full as lovely as is this of hers. And yet the painter flattered her a little, Unless I flatter with myself too much. Her hair is auburn, mine is perfect yellow; If that be […]

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Julia: I can’t even hate Silvia, she’s really nice (4.4.159-169) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

SILVIA She is beholding to thee, gentle youth. Alas, poor lady, desolate and left. I weep myself to think upon thy words. Here, youth. There is my purse. I give thee this For thy sweet mistress’ sake, because thou lov’st her. Farewell. JULIA  And she shall thank you for’t, if e’er you know her.– [Exit […]

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Julia: I acted Ariadne, abandoned by her lover Theseus–and I wept (4.4.151-158) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

JULIA  And at that time I made her weep agood, For I did play a lamentable part – Madam, ’twas Ariadne, passioning For Theseus’ perjury and unjust flight – Which I so lively acted with my tears That my poor mistress, moved therewithal, Wept bitterly; and would I might be dead, If I in thought […]

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Julia: yes Julia’s about my height, I know because I’ve worn her dress! (4.4.143-150) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

SILVIA How tall was she? JULIA  About my stature; for at Pentecost, When all our pageants of delight were played, Our youth got me to play the woman’s part, And I was trimmed in Madam Julia’s gown, Which served me as fit, by all men’s judgements, As if the garment had been made for me; […]

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Silvia: isn’t Julia meant to be really pretty? Julia: she’s totally lost her looks (4.4.134-142) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

SILVIA Is she not passing fair? JULIA  She hath been fairer, madam, than she is. When she did think my master loved her well She, in my judgement, was as fair as you. But since she did neglect her looking-glass And threw her sun-expelling mask away, The air hath starved the roses in her cheeks […]

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Julia: you could say that I know Julia yes (4.4.128-133) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

SILVIA Dost thou know her? JULIA  Almost as well as I do know myself. To think upon her woes I do protest That I have wept a hundred several times. SILVIA Belike she thinks that Proteus hath forsook her? JULIA I think she doth, and that’s her cause of sorrow.   (4.4.128-133)   Dost thou know […]

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Silvia: I won’t accept it! not from a man who’s behaved so badly! (4.4.118-127) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

JULIA  [offering the ring] Madam, he sends your ladyship this ring. SILVIA The more shame for him that he sends it me; For I have heard him say a thousand times, His Julia gave it him at his departure. Though his false finger have profaned the ring, Mine shall not do his Julia so much wrong. […]

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Julia delivers the WRONG letter! Silvia rips up the RIGHT one! (4.4.107-117) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

JULIA  [giving a letter] Madam, please you peruse this letter. Pardon me, madam, I have unadvised Delivered you a paper that I should not. [Julia takes back the letter and gives Silvia another] This is the letter to your ladyship. SILVIA I pray thee, let me look on that again. JULIA It may not be, good […]

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Julia: where is Silvia? Silvia: oh are you here for the wretched picture? (4.4.95-106) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

[Enter Silvia] JULIA  Gentlewoman, good day. I pray you be my mean To bring me where to speak with Madam Silvia. SILVIA What would you with her, if that I be she? JULIA If you be she, I do entreat your patience To hear me speak the message I am sent on. SILVIA From whom? […]

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Julia: I don’t want to do this! but I have to! so I’ll do it REALLY badly! (4.4.84-94) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare

JULIA  This ring I gave him when he parted from me, To bind him to remember my good will. And now am I, unhappy messenger, To plead for that which I would not obtain; To carry that which I would have refused; To praise his faith, which I would have dispraised. I am my master’s […]

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Recent Posts

  • Hamlet: what an absolute WASTE; can I have a moment please? (4.4.24-30) #InkyCloak #SlowShakespeare
  • Captain: we’re off to fight for NOTHING (4.4.16-23) #InkyCloak #SlowShakespeare
  • Hamlet: um, whose army? (Is this an INVASION?) (4.4.8-15) #InkyCloak #SlowShakespeare
  • Enter FORTINBRAS! cool, calm, and in control (4.4.1-8) #InkyCloak #SlowShakespeare
  • Claudius: dear England, you get to do my dirty work (4.3.56-66) #InkyCloak #SlowShakespeare

Recent Comments

  1. Hester Lees-Jeffries on Hamlet: my dad died unprepared! I can’t kill my uncle now, no (3.3.80-87) #InkyCloak #SlowShakespeare
  2. Hester Lees-Jeffries on Hamlet: I’m looking at HIM! Gertrude: there’s NOTHING THERE! (3.2.121-131) #InkyCloak #SlowShakespeare
  3. Sunil on Hamlet: my dad died unprepared! I can’t kill my uncle now, no (3.3.80-87) #InkyCloak #SlowShakespeare
  4. Sunil on Hamlet: I’m looking at HIM! Gertrude: there’s NOTHING THERE! (3.2.121-131) #InkyCloak #SlowShakespeare
  5. Hester Lees-Jeffries on Claudius: and I’m still enjoying the wages of my sins! (3.3.51-56) #Inky Cloak #SlowShakespeare