STEPHANO Mooncalf, speak once in thy life, if thou be’st a good mooncalf.
CALIBAN How does thy honour? Let me lick thy shoe. I’ll not serve him, he is not valiant.
TRINCULO Thou liest, most ignorant monster. I am in case to jostle a constable. Why thou deboshed fish, thou, was there ever man a coward that hath drunk so much sack as I today? Wilt thou tell a monstrous lie, being but half a fish and half a monster?
CALIBAN Lo, how he mocks me. Wilt thou let him, my lord?
TRINCULO ‘Lord’, quoth he? That a monster should be such a natural!
CALIBAN Lo, lo again! Bite him to death, I prithee.
STEPHANO Trinculo, keep a good tongue in your head. If you prove a mutineer—the next tree! The poor monster’s my subject, and he shall not suffer indignity.
CALIBAN I thank my noble lord. Wilt thou be pleased to hearken once again to the suit I made to thee?
STEPHANO Marry, will I. Kneel and repeat it; I will stand, and so will Trinculo. (3.2.20-39)
Mooncalf, simpleton, fool, monster – still not exactly complimentary, but Stephano is treating Caliban a little more kindly than Trinculo, perhaps? He wants him to talk (perhaps because he finds him amusing and wants to laugh at him?) And Caliban obliges, slavishly, self-abasingly, perhaps picking up the animal suggestion in both mooncalf and the dogs to which Trinculo has just compared them. He fawns: How does thy honour? Let me lick thy shoe. Is he on the ground already? And a (sly?) fostering of potential division between Stephano and Trinculo: I’ll not serve him, Trinculo, he is not valiant. This naturally incenses Trinculo, not willing to be insulted by one whom he dismisses as a monster, most ignorant monster. His assertion of his valour is not especially impressive, however: I am in case to jostle a constable; I’m perfectly capable of, er, having a bit of a scrap with a security guard. Don’t you tell me I’m a coward! I’ve drunk a huge amount! (Logic not the strong suit of anyone as drunk as this, let alone Trinculo.) You deboshed fish! Deboshed is debauched; there is no indication that Caliban is particularly debauched (although he may well be clinging to Stephano’s leg, attempting to lick his shoe…) – but deboshed fish sounds appropriately drunken, as well as being ridiculous. (What would a debauched fish even look like?) It is a lie, a monstrous lie, because Caliban is half monster, half fish. Trinculo is not making any kind of case here for his valour or his sobriety… Taking sides again: he’s being mean to me, Caliban says to Stephano. Are you going to let him, my lord? (My lord: more sly flattery, perhaps? Caliban might not be as incapable as it appears.) Won’t you defend me? Lord? Trinculo is incredulous – he knows that Stephano is a butler. The monster is a natural, a complete fool! He’s being mean to me again, says Caliban. Bite him to death! (This is not a realistic possibility, but it might reflect the torments that Caliban is apparently accustomed to.) Stephano attempts to speak with gravitas, apparently now considering himself to be some kind of military commander: if Trinculo is uncivil, even to Caliban, it will be mutiny, and he will suffer the penalty, that is, being hanged from the nearest tree. (Compare Macbeth, on hearing news that the wood is, apparently, on the move: ‘If thou speak’st false, upon the next tree shall thou hang alive till famine cling thee’, 5.5.) The poor monster’s my subject; I am responsible for him: do not treat him with discourtesy, because that is also an insult to me and my authority. (Noblesse oblige, anachronistically.) And Caliban plays along: I thank my noble lord. (Just how drunk is Caliban? Just how cunning?) Because then there’s a turn to a plot point: Wilt thou be pleased to hearken once again to the suit I made to thee? I’ve already asked you to do something for me. Can I ask you again, o great and gracious leader? Go ahead, says Stephano, loftily. Kneel and repeat it. Trinculo and I will stay standing; we’re still entirely capable of standing, especially if we prop each other up…
