DUKE Thank me for this more than for all the favours Which, all too much, I have bestowed on thee. But if thou linger in my territories Longer than swiftest expedition Will give thee time to leave our royal court, By heaven, my wrath shall far exceed the love I ever bore my daughter or […]
Continue ReadingDuke: you’re deluded, she’s totally out of your league, get out! (3.1.150-160) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare
DUKE What’s here? ‘Silvia, this night I will enfranchise thee.’ ’Tis so! And here’s the ladder for the purpose! Why Phaëton, for thou art Merops’ son, Wilt thou aspire to guide the heavenly car, And with thy daring folly burn the world? Wilt thou reach stars because they shine on thee? Go, base intruder, over-weening […]
Continue ReadingAWKWARD: Dad reads sexy poem meant for his daughter while boyfriend cringes (3.1.137-149) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare
DUKE What letter is this same? What’s here? ‘To Silvia’? And here an engine fit for my proceeding! I’ll be so bold to break the seal for once. [He reads] ‘My thoughts do harbour with my Silvia nightly, And slaves they are to me that send them flying. O, could their master come and go […]
Continue ReadingJust hide the rope ladder under your cloak. Yes, a cloak just like this one… (3.1.126-136) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare
DUKE But hark thee: I will go to her alone. How shall I best convey the ladder thither? VALENTINE It will be light, my lord, that you may bear it Under a cloak that is of any length. DUKE A cloak as long as thine will serve the turn? VALENTINE Ay, my good lord. DUKE […]
Continue ReadingValentine: what YOU need, is a ROPE LADDER! (like my one) (3.1.117-126) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare
VALENTINE Why then, a ladder quaintly made of cords, To cast up with a pair of anchoring hooks, Would serve to scale another Hero’s tower, So bold Leander would adventure it. DUKE Now as thou art a gentleman of blood, Advise me where I may have such a ladder. VALENTINE When would you use it? […]
Continue ReadingDuke: they keep her locked up! Valentine: climb in at her window! (3.1.106-116) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare
DUKE But she I mean is promised by her friends Unto a youthful gentleman of worth, And kept severely from resort of men, That no man hath access by day to her. VALENTINE Why then I would resort to her by night. DUKE Ay, but the doors be locked and keys kept safe That no […]
Continue ReadingValentine, being depressingly familiar in his toxicity (3.1.96-105) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare
VALENTINE If she do frown, ’tis not in hate of you, But rather to beget more love in you. If she do chide, ’tis not to have you gone, Forwhy the fools are mad if left alone. Take no repulse, whatever she doth say: For ‘Get you gone!’ she doth not mean ‘Away’. Flatter, and […]
Continue ReadingValentine: well have you tried sending her shiny things? (3.1.89-95) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare
VALENTINE Win her with gifts if she respect not words. Dumb jewels often in their silent kind More than quick words do move a woman’s mind. DUKE But she did scorn a present that I sent her. VALENTINE A woman sometime scorns what best contents her. Send her another. Never give her o’er, For scorn […]
Continue ReadingDuke to Valentine: teach me how to talk to modern girls? (3.1.80-88) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare
VALENTINE What would your grace have me to do in this? DUKE There is a lady of Verona here Whom I affect, but she is nice and coy, And naught esteems my aged eloquence. Now, therefore, would I have thee to my tutor – For long agone I have forgot to court; Besides, the fashion […]
Continue ReadingDuke: my daughter won’t obey me; what I need is a WIFE (3.1.68-79) #2Dudes1Dog #SlowShakespeare
DUKE No, i’faith. She is peevish, sullen, froward, Proud, disobedient, stubborn, lacking duty, Neither regarding that she is my child Nor fearing me as if I were her father. And may I say to thee, this pride of hers Upon advice hath drawn my love from her, And where I thought the remnant of mine […]
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