HAMLET         [to Horatio]    How absolute the knave is! We must speak by the card or equivocation will undo us. By the Lord, Horatio, this three years I have took note of it, the age is grown so picked that the toe of the peasant comes so near the heel of the courtier he galls his kibe. – How long hast thou been grave-maker?

GRAVEDIGGER          Of the days i’th’ year I came to’t that day that our last King Hamlet overcame Fortinbras.

HAMLET         How long is that since?

GRAVEDIGGER          Cannot you tell that? Every fool can tell that! It was that very day that young Hamlet was born – he that is mad and sent into England.     (5.1.129-140)

He’s very LITERAL isn’t he? Hamlet observes to Horatio; how absolute the knave is! We must speak by the card or equivocation will undo us; best leave him no room for quibbling whatsoever. By the Lord, Horatio, this three years I have took note of it—I’ve been noticing this for ages, now—the age is grown so picked that the toe of the peasant comes so near the heel of the courtier he galls his kibe. The way things are now, even the lower orders are so sharp they’ll cut themselves—following so closely on their betters that they might as well be chafing their chilblains! (But perhaps said with a tone of amusement; he’s rather enjoying this exchange at the moment, is Hamlet.)

Another switch, so. How long hast thou been grave-maker? Making conversation, but also genuine curiosity, perhaps; who is this man? And the gravedigger can name it exactly, making a precise connection between the personal and the political: well, what do you know, of the days i’th’ year I came to’t that day that our last King Hamlet overcame Fortinbras. A famous victory! Hamlet’s amused by the precision: how long is that since? (He knows the answer, of course, but perhaps he’s amusing Horatio.) Cannot you tell that? You with your expensive education, sir? (He doesn’t recognise Hamlet, but he knows a gentleman when he sees one.) Every fool can tell that! It was that very day that young Hamlet was born—perhaps a glance between the friends, a smile—he that is mad and sent into England. (Smile might turn to laugh, hastily turned into a cough. Definitely not recognised, then.)